A New Beginning

Think!

There are so many songs about thoughts:

In "Think," Aretha Franklin warns her lover to think about how his actions are affecting her. 

In "Cat's In The Cradle," Harry Chapin looks back on his life with regret about how his past actions led him to a struggling relationship with his adult son.

And in one of my favorite, lesser-known songs by Fountains of Wayne called "New Routine," a bunch of loosely connected people search for something new in their lives only to realize that changing their surroundings does not cure the ennui of daily life.

In all of these songs, it is the characters' thoughts that cause them pain and distress.  They might blame their feelings on what someone else says or does, but in truth, it is their own thoughts about their situation that are the underlying source of struggle and strife.

I’m a science guy through and through.  Sure, I’m aware that I am thinking throughout the day, but I never put much thought into my thoughts.  I mean, what does that even mean?  You live your life.  You think your thoughts.  Is there really anything more to it?  It turns out: Yes!  So much more.

For me, in spite of many successes, my thoughts about myself were not very nice.  My thoughts were typically negative and focused on the things I couldn’t or shouldn’t be doing.  I thought that most of my success was linked to my rigid, black-and-white thoughts.  If I do this, then I will achieve this.  I never challenged those thoughts.  Why should I?  I had already achieved all of the success I was going to achieve.  I am a successful doctor with a robust practice and patients that I like and who like me.  I have a loving wife and amazing kids.  I have arrived.  Yet, in spite of all of those achievements, my thoughts remained negative.  So much self-doubt.  So much fear.  That’s just how I am.

Then, I began to learn about thought management.  At first glance, I rolled my eyes.  Woo woo personal development.  Who has the time for that?  It turns out, we need to make the time for that.  Through coaching, I learned that those negative thoughts were largely driving my self-doubt and fears.  And what came next was really incredible.  I learned that I had a choice.  I could continue with thinking those same thoughts and getting the same results in my life, or I could adjust my thinking and finally achieve the feelings and results I was looking for.  Sound too good to be true?  It’s not.  But it is work.  Undoing a life of negative thinking isn’t easy.  It essentially looks like hanging outdoor Christmas lights.  First, you dig around through the Christmas decorations to find the right box.  When you finally find that box, it turns out that all of the lights are tangled in a big ball.  You tirelessly untangle the lights and plug them in, only to find that most of the strands don’t even light up.  You finally get the lights hung up and realize that the ends of the plugs don’t match and you need to start over.  After hours of hard work, your family looks at the lights in awe and you look up and think: "Yeah.  I did that.  I can do hard things."  

Thought management is a skill.  It does not come naturally, but with practice, it does come.  The first step is recognizing that there is something you want to change.  Once you have identified that thing, it is time to get to work.  Why do you want the change?  What are you hoping to achieve?  Why don't you have those results now?  What is holding you back?  And that, my friend, is when the real work begins. 

So, what are you thinking about?  Is there something you are hoping to change, but not quite sure where to start?  Contact me today for a complimentary session to see if physician coaching might be right for you.

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PS.  I get a lot of inspiration from music lyrics. Many people use inspiring quotes (and I may too), but music lyrics really speak to me.  I hope you find inspiration in the lyrics too.

 MGMT - Little Dark Age

Link to the lyrics:

https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/mgmt/littledarkage.html